TLC

Talking to myself


It kills you isn't it?


1. When he stops making surprises and settles for what is easier to get, to have, to accomplish, to do for you. For example, he stops sending you text messages with feelings in it and settles for a phone call (unlimited call promo of networks) because it's just a one or two press away. It rings, he says hi and asks how you are, end of conversation... his obligation is done, next page please. Quicker right? Less effort.


2. What about in giving gifts?
Well he used to think hard about what to get me on special occasions or what to do for me. But now, he picks anything on sale not minding if I could really use it in real life. Worst, he doesn't get me anything or I would have to share half of how much it costs.


3. Does he still care with how you look or what you are thinking?
Let me see, the last time I checked, he's too busy. With so many things happening around him, (in his studies, his job, and in his business), checking out my new hair, or reading my blog or notes or emails or offline messages is like lightyears away from his list.


4. But what about if you are spending time together?
OK i'll tell you about it. Well, nothing happens if I don't do the asking and telling. Going to see movies, eating in a restaurant, going to church, it all happens because I do all the planning and event organizing, he just goes with the flow.


Talking to Mr.


Dear Mr.,


First, I appreciate that unlimited call. But haven't you noticed? Important conversations are done through text messaging (at least in our case), difficult things to say over the phone are easier to formulate through texting, without one trying to interrupt another. Thoughts are sent one by one and both of us could respond to each one of it.
Plus if it is anything sweet and sincere, you can always keep them and read them over and over again.


Second, I will give you a hint, usefulness is important. It is something you should consider in buying a gift. It would really not matter if it's on sale as long as it's not shop-lifted (hehe). And gift-giving rule: Don't give for the sake of giving. Don't treat it as one of those house chores you posted on the fridge that you can put a check on when you're done doing it. Plus plus plus, it doesn't need a special occasion to give a special someone something. And it is very very very unforgetable if it is anything you had worked on yourself, just like that video you did.


Third, I 'm cute but I'm not stupid. Of course I consider the fact that you are juggling too many responsibilities and commitments and I'm proud of you because of that. But if you really like someone, you don't lose track of her. You wanna see how she would look in this hair or that, in this dress color or that, seeing her even in pictures on the internet would always make you feel excited (that's what I think because that's how I am to you). It doesn't take you an hour to open her page you know and drop some messages. Most importantly, it does really matter knowing that you care about what's on my head (not just what's between my legs). It's sexy and very manly if a guy checks out a woman's opinion over prevailing issues, or a woman's translation over a single ordinary everyday experience. It's a feeling of "I matter".


Fourth, simple. Take control. You're the man. I am giving you that power! Of course, I have my own suggestions and all, that is the time we (as a team) weigh things and decide together.

100 pogi points for you!

John dx lapid: nang... when things like this happen one should understand... og ikaw pud ang nasayop o nasuko musabot pud ko... we dont need to fight
John dx lapid: or to stress a point nga wa magpakabana ang usa nato..
John dx lapid: we just need to be humble... and understand things. listen to reasons and know how to apologize.
John dx lapid: kahibaw man pud ta satong mga laing gibuhat diba...
John dx lapid: we know always how to weigh things... reporter gud ta.
John dx lapid: pasensiya na nako if wala dayon ko kakita og way to communicate with you nang...

I'm just sharing this to you readers because I'm sooo proud of him. This was how he handled my serious "why did you not text me immediately?" disease.

P.S. name of bf withheld, some crazy chicks might track him down and take him away. haha

I'm a big dreamer

You don't have to always mix reality when dreaming. Don't put a limit into it, a price, or a condition, just go wild with it. Dream as if you are the richest man on earth, the most beautiful, the luckiest, or as if you'll die the next day.

Then, find a person you can share it with. Someone who doesn't go saying "hey it's impractical," or"you are too young to have that dream." Someone who can just laugh about it with you, or even makes your big dreams bigger. That person you are not afraid of telling because he believes in you and all he wants is to make you happy.

So to prove that I am a big and wild dreamer. Here are some of my biggest and wildest dreams:

1. travel around the world before 30 (hahaha in a hot air balloon)

2. audition for a hollywood movie (dream role: lara croft)

3. build a house by the lake (with an underground for hackers)

4. live in beverly hills (i'll be in the highest hill hahaha)

5. own a hotel (and be friends with Paris waaaaahahaha)

To the person who always bursts my bubbles. Give a little trust. I'm not losing my mind, I'm not having a choppy communication with reality, I'm just enjoying what seems to me as the only free thing in this world... and that's dreaming.

i miss college

I miss my friends and all the things we used to do. I miss the songs we used to sing in our boarding house. I miss the exchange of books, cd's, dvd's. I miss the dance rehearsals and costumes.The poetry readings we used to go to.

I miss the books, notebooks, photocopies and the times we tried to study for an exam. I miss the fights we used to have over some petty things and I was always the first one to say sorry. The jeepney rides and the strolling after school (or in between classes) to Ayala.

I miss the internet cafe's where we used to spend our nights making reports or just surfing. I miss the junk food party at the canteen. The newspaper readings and chatting at the library. The times we stroll on covered walks going to our classrooms, and crossing the street to AS Building.

I miss the smiling 5 teachers (hehe). The teachers who only faces the chalkboard. And the teachers who didn't care if we went to class, just have good exam scores and you're ok.

I miss every single thing about being a college girl, making and shaping dreams believing that life's easy. So optimistic, idealistic...

So here's the lyrics of one of my favorite songs back in college.

Good Riddance by Greenday

Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road



Time grabs you by the wrist, directs you where to go


So make the best of this test, and don't ask why


It's not a question, but a lesson learned in time






It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.


I hope you had the time of your life.






So take the photographs, and still frames in your mind


Hang it on a shelf in good health and good time


Tattoos of memories and dead skin on trial


For what it's worth it was worth all the while






It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.


I hope you had the time of your life.






It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.


I hope you had the time of your life.






It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right.


I hope you had the time of your life.

Hopeful

This normally happens to us.


It would take us at least 2 months to live normally everytime tatay leaves us for work. He has been doing this for almost 25 years. Everytime he leaves it's always like the first time.


Last Friday night, while I was on a taxi after having dinner with a friend, I saw this beautiful moon. It was so round and bright and somehow mysteriously huge. It seemed hanging low in the sky, I thought somewhere in the world you could probably touch it. Mixed with a Coldplay song on the radio, it was nostalgic.


When I was a little girl, not yet hooked up with MTV and primetime shows. Tatay and I would spend some time outside our house. The streets then were clear by 8PM and all we could hear is the sound of karaoke few houses away. 

Me with a glass of milk and tatay with his beer. We used to talk about my dream house and my extremely weird ambition of going to planet Mars. And tatay, like a winner narrator tells me with all excitement their love story.

It's starts with him riding a bike and nanay with her girlfriends in a tambayan watching him passing by. And it ends with having my nanay pregnant so they could get married before he leaves for work abroad. And if you ask my nanay, she will tell the same story.

Tatay won't be home in time for their 25th anniversary August next year. But he said he'll be with us for Christmas and New Year, and they'll have to have their anniv celebration by that time. Hopeful.

If Only

Missing my Tatay starts at the moment he packs his stuff.


I watched him load up his trunk last Friday, and I think I have seen him doing this routine for about fifteen times or more.


It always gets me.


If only I won the lottery, or got discovered in a reality-talent show, or have a job that pays let's say, a hundred thousand a day... my tatay would never have to leave and work abroad.


I could provide him the gasoline station franchise he wanted. He could run the business with nanay. Loui, Era, and I can continue with anything we want. If Loui passes the PMMA, he can spend four more years there, he doesn't have to worry about working right after college so he can help tatay provide for the family. Era can well maybe, pursue her hollywood dreams. And I can continue with my job not thinking about my salary just doing this for love (I guess) and perhaps fulfilling my father's dream of having a lawyer daughter.

My father has been working as a seaman for 24 years already. I was his only baby when he started working abroad. I can still remember that one night, he woke me up with the sound of a sliding penguin toy. I was happy but unsure if the toy was really for me, because I did not recognize the man holding the toy right in front of me. I first addressed him as "tiyo" (uncle) he laughed and told me he's TATAY.

Still I was doubtful, but when he started to sing that Bread popularized song--- "IF" well, I can imagine my eyes sparkling... the voice was the same in about a dozen of cassette tapes that nanay used to play every afternoon to get me to sleep. Tatay used to send us voice tapes instead of letters. He would sing and talk like we were just in front of him. Nanay and I sent voice tapes too. It contained my mathematics and english lessons with her. He could hear me count, sing the alphabet, and recite english words. Somehow, he was with me while I started learning a lot of things.

Tatay is 46 now. I'm a little sad realizing that I was not able to keep my promise. I once whispered in my bedroom walls my promise to have him stop working by the age of 45 so he can stay with nanay. I thought I can handle the challenge of raising my family. Reality bites.

Like a child

"There are no accidents..."

"Yesterday is history, Tomorrow is a mystery, Today is a gift, that is why it is called PRESENT."

Lines from Kung Fu Panda.

After Tatay left last Saturday, the rest of the family spent Sunday watching Kung Fu Panda, Wild Child, and Narnian. We were accompanied by the sweetest and cutest cousins in the whole wide world. :)

Coco, Dodo, Nap-nap, Ai-Ai, El-El, and Evony... you kids are so innocent, you make us humble.You blew away the sadness after Tatay left. For sure, Tatay misses you too, kulets...and he'll bring home toys and chocolates for all of you.

OPPPSSSS

Pink October Episode of Halad sa Kapamilya was moved to October 10, 2009 (that's this Saturday). Manila did a special coverage on Ondoy and Pepeng in our timeslot. :)

PINK OCTOBER

Watch Halad sa Kapamilya this Saturday, October 3, 2009 at 7AM live in Barangay Lahug with host Leo Lastimosa.

What to expect:
1. a story of a cancer survivor
2. more info about cancer
3. relief campaign update
4. two children needing your financial assistance

Cancer survivors will be helping Sagip Kapamilya in packing relief goods for the victims of Ondoy.

CDQ: Do we need government?

Three by Conrado de Quiros

Philippine Daily Inquirer

First Posted 04:35:00 09/30/2009

Filed Under: Inquirer Politics, Ondoy, Flood, Disasters & Accidents, Government

One, after Fernando Poe, Jr. died on Dec. 14, 2004, they did an inventory of his things. In one bodega, they found cartons of relief goods that were meant to be delivered to Infanta, Quezon. Infanta had been buried in mudslides a couple of weeks before his death and, along with many others, FPJ had bestirred himself to help.

With one difference: While all the other relief-givers were busy putting their names on their donations—or as in the case of many public officials, putting their names on other people’s donations—FPJ was not. His people would swear later he would not hear of it. He gave strict orders for the relief goods to be unmarked and just sent where needed. It altered my view of the man completely and made me vow to make amends to his family for some of the things I had said about him.

That is class. Which makes me furious today about the politicians who want to exploit the misfortune of others for their ends. Or indeed their continuing travail, many of them having lost everything in one of the worst disasters ever to hit this metropolis. It’s a sentiment I know is shared by many, even those who were not directly ravaged by the floods, as I’ve seen in news reports and blogs.

Heading the pack is Willie Revillame who was busy announcing that “kami nga ni Senator Villar” have been tireless in delivering relief goods to the needy. You’d think the guy would have learned a thing or two from being crucified after he vituperated about Cory’s coffin being shown on his show, consequently disrupting his and his audience’s fun. Clearly his chastisement hasn’t chastened him enough. Or he’s just fundamentally tasteless he cannot see that the last thing the victims want is to be treated like contestants, or supplicants, of “Wowowee” waiting upon his generosity.

Thankfully the tack is likely to backfire. People are in a foul mood and are not likely to remember Revillame—or his principal—with fondness come election time.

The last thing we need is to see politics mix with relief. “When you want to shoot, shoot,” as Eli Wallach said in “The Good, the Bad and the Ugly,” finishing off the guy who was threatening him with all sorts of mayhem. Same principle here: When you want to give, give, don’t advertise. All you’ll get back is mayhem in the minds of the beneficiaries.

Two, on Tuesday government’s disaster council gave a briefing. They were three days late. The time to have done that was Saturday at the height of the rains. The time to have appeared in public to calm down a metropolis in the grip of panic was last Saturday. The time to have gone to the aid of people who had every reason to panic (some of them were huddling on the roofs of their houses, along with their children and their aged, pounded by unceasing rain) was last Saturday. The time to have unleashed the full resources of government, which should have been there because government has—or should have—billions of pesos in calamity and emergency funds, was last Saturday.

In fact the monumental thing that happened last Saturday was the complete absence of government. The only government there was were the media, notably ABS-CBN and GMA-7. You can forgive both for advertising their wares, or relief efforts, under the extenuating circumstances. They were the government. They were the central authority apprising the public of the situation. They were the central authority coming to the aid of the victims. They were the central authority running the country.

The Internet is full of reports that the emergency fund is depleted, having gone to fund Arroyo and company’s not-very-emergency trips abroad. I’ll leave that for when it’s confirmed. But the breakdown of government is staggering. Arroyo should thank God, or whatever entity she worships, we have elections—the same elections she tried to monkey with earlier with Charter change. Without that she would probably not last this week, given an incensed citizenry, given an aroused citizenry, given a citizenry that will no longer brook abuse. This is as angry as I’ve seen residents of Metro Manila in a long time.

Three, indeed to this hour, what government we have is courtesy of the private sector where voluntarism has sprung like wildflowers. That is the bright spot in all this, the light amid the darkness, the blazing sun after the storm. Truly the Filipino rises to his finest self during trying times, the more trying the times, the finer the rising. Or it is in times of disaster that the Filipino ceases to be a disaster, thinking of others first before self.

It’s especially heartening to see the kids go en masse on relief mode. Many of the kids in my neighborhood have done so, teeners who normally while away the holidays playing basketball, flipping rollerblades, and drinking beer in the stores. They’ve enrolled themselves to help without thought of pay, without thought of recompense, without thought of reward. Just the thought of doing something nice for a change, just the thought of doing something to make things better.

It rekindles memories of the July-August floods of 1972, when students also went in droves to places in Greater Manila no longer traversable by land, or indeed outside the metropolis where they were greeted by a greater ravaging. But then there was activism to fuel, or goad, or flagellate the youth to idealism. Well, there was also the prospect of meeting a cool chick or a cool cat while on your best form. Today, there’s just spontaneous goodwill to do the trick. And the prospect of meeting a cool chick or a cool cat while on your best form. The kids come home happy, comparing the welts and bruises on their arms from lifting crates while drinking beer in the stores.

Makes you wonder what on earth you need government for.

                                  ***********************************************

I have to agree with everything CDQ wrote. I was out on field last Saturday. There was a boat from Cebu going to Bohol which had an engine trouble. There were110 passengers. The strong waves pushed the boat to Mactan Channel. The passengers wore life vests for almost six hours and were already soaking wet.

I went to Coastguard office three times but no officials came down to at least tell us if they were already communicating with the captain of the ship making sure that help was coming. The other boat of the shipping company rescued the passengers. No coastguard official or personnel was ever there. Except for the time when they asked for the captain's marine protest.

And yes, I saw on TV how the people saved their own lives from Ondoy. I saw people climbing on the roof, others found themselves some improvised boat. There were people climbing trees and holding on to ropes. Others showed their swimming skills in mocha-colored water. There were rescuers but it was obviously an unprepared emergency response.

Now comes the distribution of relief goods. The business sector was the fastest responding sector. With  Kris Aquino encouraging big companies to donate, Sagip Kapamilya has now more than P51M cash donation as of Thursday.

I can understand if big companies or business organizations would want themselves acknowledged when giving donations. But public officials, politicians who put their names on plastic bags, faces printed on t-shirts given to victims and volunteers, is a different story.

As public officials, (or aspiring politicians) automatically your job is to serve the people. You were the one who approached them and told them you wanted to be a public servant. You do not have to be acknowledged everytime a plastic bag of food will be handed over to each victims. The victims can even slap or choke you if they get little from you. haha

Thank You volunteers!

PHOTOS:

1. Top shot of student volunteers

2. Members of Guardians International resting after a whole day of packing relief goods

3. Students filling up the container van with relief goods

4. Ronnie happy with Cebuano's response to help Ondoy victims

5. Lapu-Lapu City relief goods just arrived

6. Students sorting out donated used clothing

7. Students carrying sacks of relief goods ready to be shipped

Cebuanos gathered to help out in their own ways. Others brought in cash and goods while others chose to give their time and strength in packing the relief goods for Ondoy victims. Mabuhi ang tanang mga volunteers!